Bilbo at Sera Je

A journey back to India for Billbo

2010-01-25T08:18:00.003-05:00

Well its off again! Tomorrow a return journey to Sera. This time with Andrea and Tim.

Please feel free to share this blog with others.

Big Love to All!

Billbo

Moving forward

2009-12-18T08:43:00.004-05:00

www.wondrousjourney.net is now open. With this site I plan to share more of my travels. Photos, videos and books will also be available.

I will be returning to Sera at the end of January. This time my wife Andrea and 19 year old son Tim will be traveling with me. I can't wait to see India through Tim's eyes. While there I plan to shoot the final shots I need to complete the documentary I have been working on. Thanks for the love and support. Keep and eye here for update from India and please share this blog and my websites.

For those of you new to this blog I encourage you to look back through the older posts. You'll find many images from my trip to India last year and discover a bit about my journey.

Big Love,
Billbo

www.wondrousjourney.net
www.bodhileafproductions.net

Where I am

2009-05-08T17:09:00.002-04:00

There is so much suffering in the world. So much of it self inflicted. So much of it inflicted upon others. All of it simply our karma ripening. The causes and conditions we created over many lifetimes coming together to create the life we experience. Understanding karma may not make the pain any less, it may not make the persecutor or the oppressor go away. You need only to look at the plight of the Tibetan people to know that. A true understanding of karma will provide something for you that will give you a freedom you never thought you could have. It will take all power away from the oppressor, the persecutor, the bully. Once you have a realization of the truth of karma you can longer be a victim, pushed and pulled by the powers around you. You will see and understand that all things that come to you in this life come to you because you created the potential for them. If you want to know how you lived your last life, what kind of person you were, you need only to look at your condition in this life. If you want to know what your next life will be like you need only to look at how you are living this one. It is all up to you.

I pray that Mike's Mom came through her surgery today.

Pictures posted

2009-03-14T13:08:00.002-04:00

Hi all. I've posted a bunch of pictures on flikr.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/32240358@N08/sets/72157611220462025/show/

I had pretty big computer issue where I lost a bunch of my work, as well as having to rebuild most of the computer. Sooooo I am now rebuilding the doc. It is probably just as well. I'm much happier with what I have going on now.

Bilbo

Space

2008-12-23T22:20:00.002-05:00

When a great Lama was pressed to teach a patron how to meditate he said, "Do you know the space which exist between one thought and the next?"
"Why yes. Of course." replied the patron.
The Lama looked him in the eyes and said simply "Prolong it".

I find that since I have been back I struggle not to fill the space with the radio, the TV, the next battle or thoughts of the last. It was expected. It is what we do in the west. It seems that we in this country have a great fear of being alone with ourselves, with our thoughts. What is it that we are afraid we will see? What is it that lies within the silence that we are afraid to hear?

An image comes to mind of a Tibetan nomad. Alone he stands upon a high plain. The strong wind blowing in waves across the grass. In the distance, rising up from the plain giant snow mountains surround him. The sky is a deep blue and the sun shines brilliantly in the clear thin air. His company is his thoughts. He needs no radio or TV. Where do those thoughts take him? What does he fill the space with?

Perhaps if we persevere and prolong the moment, expand the space between those two thoughts the causes of our suffering will be revealed. Our attachments, our arrogance and our ignorance exposed for what they are.

Bilbo

New to this blog

2008-12-16T10:05:00.005-05:00

Hi All!

If you are new to this blog you may want to go back through the archive on the right to get a feel for what I have written here before reading my Reflections entry. This will help somewhat with perspective. It is all un-edited without much time spent on the rules of grammar. I wrote from the heart about what I saw and what I felt.

If you would like to see some more photos check out

http://www.flickr.com/photos/32240358@N08/sets/72157611220462025/

Bilbo

Images of Bylakuppe

2008-12-07T13:53:00.000-05:00

Reflections

2008-12-04T18:55:00.008-05:00

This trip was not one of new discovery it was more about re-awakening a part of me that has been buried for so very long. As a younger man I traveled a lot of different paths searching for some kind of spiritual truth. I felt compelled to look for answers. Somewhere along the line I felt that I had the answers. Then, broadsided by the demands of western society the spiritual quest slipped a little more with each passing year until it became simply something I once did. I still cared deeply about it, but told myself I was satisfied with the answers I had found. And that may be true. I had found some pretty wonderful answers to life's questions over the years. The problem is I wasn't applying them to my daily life.

As a small child I remember questioning the nuns at St. Catherine's. Where was God? What did he look like? How come we can't see him? I remember the answer so clearly. Sister Rose telling us that "God is all around us. That he is the sky and the trees that he is everything and that we are all a part of God." I really liked that answer and imagined God in the wind blowing through the trees with dappled sunlight coming through the waving branches, or blowing across the ocean with the waves crashing on the shore. (St. Catherine's was only 2 blocks from the beach).

Around the same time I remember having mass explained. That the tabernacle on the alter was where God lived and that every Sunday when the priest said mass he would would open the door of the tabernacle where the host and the wine were and let God out. This really confused me. If God was everything how did they get him inside that little house and why would he stay in there until the priest let him out? That, at least, is how I remember hearing it.

One morning when I was in the first grade the fog was so thick on the playground you couldn't see the school 20 yard away. It was magic. The cool moisture on my skin, the sound of the nearby ocean. I remember that day so clearly. It was God all around me. I really liked God being everything and everywhere.

Then there was the other conflicting image of God. God the punisher! God high upon a marble throne. Scowling down upon poor little me. He knew everything. He saw everything. All decked out in white robes, a long white beard to match his long white hair. Kinda like Gandolf without the hat. With his staff in his left hand a and a boney finger of his right pointing at me, eyes glaring out from under bushy eyebrows he accuses me in a booming voice, "You took that cookie without asking" I knew I was condemned to hell with all those poor people who were never baptised.

Yup. I like the other God. You know the one who was all things. That seemed like a much better idea.

It's funny I don't remember being to concerned about the devil. I mean, if God created all things he had to be more powerful than the Devil, right. So I reasoned that the Devil probably wasn't all that tough, besides the angels beat him up pretty good when they kicked him out of heaven. So it made sense that if I had God looking after me as well as some pretty tough angels the devil was nothing to worry about.

So how does this all tie into my trip to India. I'm still not sure, but I'm getting there.

As a young teen I came across the Castaneda books. I thought they were amazing. Especially when I got to the third book and he talked about how the peyote and the other drugs were not needed to become a "man of knowledge". I thought how cool it would be to have a teacher, someone who would show you the way. I read more and heard about these great meditators who lived as hermits and spent their lives in meditation. How amazing would it be to have one of them as a teacher. I remember praying to whoever would listen to please send me a teacher. I wasn't sure how to go to the mountain to find this source of wisdom. As it turned out I didn't have to. The mountain came to me.

1992 was probably the worst year of my life. My grandmother passed away early in the year and shortly after my father passed away. My marriage fell apart for reasons I'll not go into here. If your curious ask me sometime. 1992 was also one of the best years of my life. I went to a meditation class that turned out to be an introduction to Buddhism class. It was there that I met my future wife, Andrea. She wrote me off at the time, I wasn't her type! It also started me on a new path. A path that brought the mountain to me.

It was a cold winter day when Geshe Tsulga arrived in Raleigh. It was also a day that changed my life. Here was the teacher that I had been looking for. I didn't realize it at the time of course, but there he was. That was 15 years ago. An awful lot has happened since then. I haven't been the best of students and wonder at my fortune at having such an amazing teacher. This trip to India and all of the events that have lead up to it has re-awakened that little boy inside who fell in love with the idea that God is everything and everything is God. I kinda like the idea of being a part of God. Sister Rose was right, everything is God and God is everything. It's all interconnected. None of it exists the way it appears. That's the fun part. The exciting part. To learn to see it how it truly exists!

Bilbo

Images

2008-12-02T20:34:00.004-05:00

Home

2008-12-02T11:47:00.003-05:00

Hello everyone. Thank you for your care and concern. The terrorist attack in Mumbai really had a huge effect in India. I was very far from it and had no problems because of it. The trip home was verrrry long, but I made it safely.

I've already begun going through my pictures. I took over a thousand so it make take a little time to post.

Bilbo

Bilbo

2008-11-29T09:41:00.004-05:00

I don't want to let this end. I have truly enjoyed sharing this little part of my life's journey with you. We are so busy with our daily grind and all the stuff that we are human doings instead of human beings. I strongly urge everyone to try the human being path it's not as hard as it may seem.

I have a notebook full of things that I was not able to post because I just didn't have the time. It may work out that I can add some more. Once home I'll put together some final thoughts and reflections on this adventure so look for more posts in a few days. I'm still to in the midst of it to be reflective. I have a pretty long plane trip for that. I'll be posting pictures and letting you know the progress on the videos as well. I'll also be providing you the opportunity to sponsor a monk here at Sera Jeh.

One last thing. There is one person without whom I never would have made this trip. Her support and love are beyond compare. I am thankful for every moment that we have together. Andrea, thank you My Love and just so you know, I did not take vows. Next life!

Big Love to All of you!!!!!!!!!

Bilbo

PS. Tim, make those Outback reservations! See you soon!

PSS. He is a great son and also sacrificed so I could be here. Tim, your the best!

Dinner

2008-11-29T09:38:00.004-05:00

It's nearly 5 o'clock and the streets begin to fill. Old monks shuffle along mala in hand and mani on their lips. Young monks run and shout, but not too loud. Others take their time and chat with friends as they make their way to the Gompa. There they will pray together, offer together and receive their evening meal together.

Bilbo

Dinner

2008-11-29T09:38:00.001-05:00

The Gong

2008-11-29T09:28:00.004-05:00

Gong....... Gong...... Gong.......

The clouds and flowers painted on the sidewalk in welcome just a few short weeks ago are now dirty and faded.

A young monks futilely sweeps aside the dirt while his brother monks recite their text in pursuit of memorization a pursuit that will last for many years to come with understanding the final destiny. No more learning.

Several hawks circle overhead silhouetted against a pale blue sky which is dotted by a few puffy white clouds. The trill of the hawks, the caw of the crows, the chirping of the many birds that make their home in the two giant coconut palms and the scratching of the sweepers broom, all in unison with the many voices reciting versus from sacred text.

All as it has been, all as it will be long after I am gone.

In the distance the lonely gong sounds gong....... gong...... gong.....

Bilbo

the final night at Sera Jeh

2008-11-29T09:11:00.004-05:00

What a treat! For my final night here one of the things I wanted to do was get a few more shots at a debate. That bad news was there is no big debate class tonight. At this point you are supposed to say oh that's bad. To which I reply, No that's good! Because there was a smaller debate class at each Khamson (temple). So I went to Tehor Khamson, the one Geshe La belongs too, and watched. There was 2 monks sitting at the top of the steps to the gompa (temple) in front of them was the entire debate class, easily a couple of hundred monks. They were basically debating their class. I watched as they laughed at their mistakes, challenged assertions and then laughed some more. I asked one of the teachers if it was ok to take pictures. He practically insisted on it.

I walked around the outside of the group and took a few shots. I really did not want to disturb the class. I sat on some steps and even though I had no clue what was being said I laughed along with them. Well I did get one point when one of the monks on top of the steps told a monk in the audience that his assertions was something that a small boy would say and proceeded to set him straight. He got a roar of laughter.

It then began to rain so everyone moved inside. I packed up my things and was getting ready to move on when the Geku insisted that I come inside. I was honored. They all moved in with me following behind and picked up the debate where they left off. I moved around and took a few more pictures sitting up front close to the action. Tea was served to all and the debate continued.

I figured I had better go. I did not want to overstay my welcome. As I moved to the back of the gompa the Geku greeted me with a you monk carrying a cup and another one of their monster teapots. He escorted me to a cushion and insisted I stay for a while longer and have some tea.

It was wonderful. The roars of laughter, the intensity of the hand slapping and foot stomping. I didn't understand the words but I got the importance. The Buddha told us not to just accept his teachings, that we should examine them like we would gold to make sure that they are pure. What an incredible way to follow this teaching.

Bilbo

Karma

2008-11-29T09:09:00.001-05:00

There is no good karma. There is no bad karma. There is simply karma. Choose what to do with it.

the last day

2008-11-29T05:03:00.001-05:00

The dawn came at it's usual pace. I just moved slowly to meet it. This is the first time that I have truly been at a loss for words. Perhaps I'll have time and thoughts later.

Bilbo

communication

2008-11-28T08:58:00.005-05:00

Arms waving about gesturing madly, grunts, groans, chirps, whistles, clicks, dashes and dots, from the back of the throat to the tip of the tongue we struggle to communicate.

The idea of the speaker, the thoughts of the listener, do they ever truly meet?

Here I sit amidst some of the most respected teachers of the Gelukpa tradition, surrounded by Geshe's and Rinpoches, vast libraries of the teachings, realized beings whom my deluded mind will not allow me to truly see, all here before me.

Frustrating? Sure at times. I would love to be able to sit and debate with and learn from them. In the end it's just words. The Buddha taught us that before we accept a teaching we should check out our teachers thoroughly. Anyone can spout out profound words and phrases, quote from great texts, its just words. A parrot may have a large vocabulary. If it's vocabulary contains word from a great teaching should we accept the parrot as our teacher?

Here at this place in this time I have been given the opportunity to observe. Here the teachings are not just words scribbled on a page and spouted out to the mindless masses to follow blindly. Here the teachings are alive in actions. They are internalized with each inward breath and shared with all when exhaled. It is Dharma in action. It is alive in the love an care shown to the young monks, the respected teacher and the silent visitor who can only smile at the kindness shown.

Bilbo

night shots

2008-11-28T00:02:00.002-05:00

I spent the evening walking the streets of Sera taking night photos. From what I could tell I think I got some pretty good shots. Sadly there is no photo or video that can capture the feel and taste of this place.

I have one interview left that I really want to get but I am having trouble finding someone to translate. It has been like this the whole trip. Many many obstacles. Lots of karma ripening. I'll do what I can with what I have.

Bilbo

night

2008-11-27T08:20:00.004-05:00

The sun has set, heavy clouds block out any chance of light from moon or stars. The dim yellow street lights sparsely located throughout the monastery do little to light the way. Still the old monks korwa, take their evening walk around the old section, circumambulating the old temples of Sera Jey and Sera Mey. The clicking of their mala beads, the whispered mantra on their lips and the shuffling of their feet mark their passing.

The night birds sing overhead, in the distant courtyard the sounds of debate rise and fall. It is said by some that the Geluk don't meditate enough. What they fail to realize that debate is a form of analytical meditation. It offers the opportunity to examine closely what you have been to taught, to ensure that you have learned it correctly and to correct what you have not.

Fires burn in the fields. An Indian family banters back and forth while cleaning after the evening meal. I make my way to the home of some western monks. Through the gate and into the inner courtyard. I stand there alone for a moment. This is a place where the Buddha's teachings are loved and practiced. A tall silent monk appears, he is silhouetted by the dim light, his robes draped gracefully about him so regal and so simple. A slow steady gate as he approaches, so calm, so peaceful. He greats me with a warm smile and a friendly voice, not much above a whisper. We chat, his Australian accent which should seem so alien here does not. I take my leave and return the streets and greet the passing Geshe's as I go.

Bilbo

the Doctor

2008-11-27T04:03:00.005-05:00

First let me say that Mumbai is a very long way from here. I would not know of the terrorist attack there had Andrea not told me. All is well here.

I awoke this morning to Geshe Tulga at my door. He said he came to visit me last night and was already asleep. He said he was very concerned that I might be very sick and wanted me to go to the doctor. I tried to assure him that it was just a head cold and that I was on the mend. He wasn't buying it so I gave in. He was so sincere in his concern and even more worried that I didn't want to go to see the doctor. When I told him that I would go he was all smiles.

We made the 15 minute trip in an autorickshaw to Camp Tonba (First Camp) there we went to the Tibetin Menzakang. We waited while the staff completed their morning prayers and I was taken right in. I felt kind of bad about this since there were others there ahead of me, but when you are swept up in a tide of Tibetan hospitality combined with concern there is no fighting this force.

There room was small with 2 wooden tables and a stool next to each. A doctor sat at each table. Mine had me sit on the stool and asked me how he could help me. I explained what was going on and the exam began. First he felt my left pulse. He began lightly and then a little deeper. He moved his fingers a little and felt it in different spots. this went of for several minutes. He then felt my right pulse. At one point he looked up at me and said "you have been having some back trouble" It was a statement not a questions. He asked me for how long and what I had been doing about it. I told him about chiropractic and how long I have been going. He said "It gives you some relief but it then comes back" again a statement. He asked me about my appetite and how frequently I urinate and then told me. "Your kidneys are out of balance. How long will you be here? I can help you with this" I explained that I would only be here a few more days. He that was to bad but if I wanted to he would give me some Tibetan medicine to take home and that if I took it as prescribed in 3 months time I would be fine. I agreed and he wrote me a prescription.

As far as my cold goes he wrote me a prescription for that as well and told me to start right away. In case you are wondering TIBETAN MEDICINE TASTES NASTY! There I think that is clear enough.

Bilbo

departure

2008-11-26T00:03:00.003-05:00

I am the last of the western visitors here at house #2. The rest left this morning with many white kata's draped around them; anticipation of home and things known and sadness at leaving this wondrous place on their faces. In a sudden flurry of activity they went from a simple breakfast and were whisked away to America.

They have each in their own way enriched my own stay here and I am glad to have had the opportunity to share this adventure with each and everyone of them.

Tashi Delek!

Bilbo

Morning

2008-11-25T23:42:00.008-05:00

A cool mist has settled over the surrounding landscape obscuring the view of the far off mountains. In the distance two monks wrapped in their dzens make their way across a silent field toward the monastery. A Tibetan flag waves it's morning salute on the breeze as one of the many giant hawks swoops in on the neighboring tower.

Indian farmers go about their silent chores chattering away in a tongue vastly different from that if the Tibetans they milk their cows and send their children to school.

The initial sunrise chatter of every bird in the jungle has now settled to a quiet chirping, the caw of a crow and the occasional cry of a circling falcon.

After the whir and activity of yesterdays holiday the streets of Sera are quiet. Silent monks wrapped against the morning chill make their way through newly swept streets to classes and debate.

From one of the many temples a gong gently sounds in a slow rhythm gong.......gong......gong.... it continues on and on. From another temple can be heard the song of prayers occasionally interrupted by the offering of bells and damarus. The prayers continue.

A peacefulness has settled in. A continuance of the monastic routine practiced for over a thousand years.

The trees of the jungle dance with the breeze. The monks pray and debate. The great hawks circles overhead as if to remind me the "...death is quick to strike. For spirit quivers in flesh like a bubble in water..." our time on this is earth, in this life is short, become aware of each precious moment.

With me or without me the gong sounds from the temple gong.....gong.....gong.....

Bilbo

House 26 and a little more

2008-11-25T08:22:00.003-05:00

So here is a little story about house 26. As I said they took very good care of me and yes their homemade chili is hot. I've learned to proceed with caution when it comes to chili here. So we are sitting around and everyone is asking me if I know there sponsor. For most I was able to answer yes. I was then asked if I new beg, big, pek he said she is an Ani in who lives in Dharamsala and always feeds the dogs. Of course they were talking about Venerable Choenyi, Peg. I said I know Choenyi and that she is indeed living in Dharamsala with her dogs and taking care of the strays. This brought out lot of smile.

Choenyi asked in her comment about reaching me. For this trip I am using bilbo_judge@hotmail.com.

Today is a the holiday and also the day many monks will be leaving for the annual debate competition. This year it will be held in Ganden which is about an 8 hour ride by bus if you travel at night, 12 by day. Many of the monks that left today traveled to Bangalore to take an overnight train.

With today being their weekly holiday as they call it there was a lot going on. Motor rickshaws were swarming like bees, with shouts of camp tanpo, camp tanpo, camp tanpo, or Kushalnagar, Kushalnagar, Kushalnagar. You have to imaging this being said in a thick Indian accent and very fast. They do this once they get fare to one of the many destinations in hopes a few more will pile in, and pile in the do. It like circus clowns in a car or college kids in a phone booth. How many Monks can you fit in an auto ricksahaw. If you want to see one follow this link
http://www.greencar.com/images/autorickshaws/Autorickshaw-1-LR.jpg

There is a lot more to this day but I am fighting a cold and there is a Medicine Buddha Puja for Geshe Tsulga so I'll come back in the morning and finish this.

Bilbo

House 26

2008-11-24T09:55:00.003-05:00

I had dinner this evening at House 26. This is Geshe Gelek of the Kadampa Center's house. The monks there were so welcoming. We sat on the floor of the front porch and ate veg mo-mos, talked and laughed. When the time came for the evening class dinner was over and we went on our way.

..................................................

I woke this morning with a killer sore throat. I ended up going to the mendzakang where a monk checked me over and felt I need some antibiotics. He gave me some cipro as well as some lozenges and pain killer. He then charged me 76 rupeess. Remember folks the exchange is about 50rups to the dollar. I gave him 500 rups and told him it was a donation. They do so much here with so little.

........................................

Thanks Bill for the comments. I'm enjoying writing this blog. I've made it a point not to go back and read through previous ones so I don't really know how they are coming across.

Big Love to All! I miss you!

Bilbo

Sonam

2008-11-24T09:29:00.004-05:00

I interviewed Sonam for the video today. I find my vocabulary far short of what is needed to tell his story, the story of others who live here and that of the Tibetan people. Their spirit and faith is far beyond what we in the west understand. Sonam says he knew from the time he was a little boy that he wanted to be a monk. He even wore robes before taking vows. He knew that if he were to truly learn the Dharma he would have to escape from Tibet. There is no freedom of religion in Tibet! Yes, they have allowed some monasteries to be rebuilt but they do not allow the Tibetans to practice their religion freely. For you my Catholic friends imagine being told that you can not have a picture of the Pope. To have one you could be accused of being a separatist and jailed in horrid conditions indefinitely. Or being forced to recite that the teachings of Jesus are poison.

Sonam like so many others escaped from Tibet into Nepal and from there to India. It took him 2 maybe 3 months to get here. In one encounter with the Nepalese police one of his traveling companions was shot and killed. There are so many tragic stories like this. How do I tell them?

The wondrous side of all this is Sera Jey. It is a society of brothers, of fathers and sons, teachers and students, each looking after the other. The older taking care of the younger and as the years go by the younger look after the aged. There is a closeness and camaraderie, a shared purpose, a shared experience. The bonds run very deep and the commitment to the Dharma even deeper. The monastic society is obviously dominated by male energy. It is an energy dedicated to love and compassion for all beings. As you walk down the road and a friend comes up, puts his hand on your shoulder and walks with you sharing his story the bond deepens. It is not unusual to see monks walking hand in hand. We in the west have a hard time with this. We need to get over it. I can really understand how this bond works. I'm not sure how to put it into words just yet. As I sit here I wonder how a woman sees and understands it. Definitately something I'll have to explore.

Bilbo

Guru Puja

2008-11-23T09:25:00.002-05:00

Several of us attended a Guru Puja at a Rinpoches home last evening. I wish I could remember his name. Any way it is the same one I had dinner with a night or two ago. Another Rinpoche who lives with him, a few Geshe's and few monks and us injees were all that was there. The second Rinpoche is a younger man who I have run in to several times around the monastery. I have to find some time to speak with him.

The Guru puja is basically an offering ceremony to the Guru. I leave it to the experts to give an in depth explanation. It consists of some wonderful prayer which we sing/chant in Tibetan. For those who don't speak Tibetan we chant along phonetically. There is an English translation so we are not chanting blindly. It is a lovely ceremony filled with bells and damarus and offerings of food and chai. The elder Rinpoche was the om-se (sp) chant master. His round face and small eyes seem hard until he looks at you and smiles. At that moment any worries fade away. He is very patient with westerners like me who are clumsy with the verse, bell and vajra.

Offering of cash and things of this world to your teacher will create some pretty good causes and conditions for you, but they are nothing compared to the offering of your practice.

Bilbo

today

2008-11-23T09:03:00.003-05:00

First off HAPPY BIRTHDAY Ah-Ma-La! I'm sorry that I am not there to celebrate with you but it was great talking to you.

Have I talked about the food? Anyone who thinks Tibetans live all tsampa and mo-mos needs to be educated. Jampa one of our cooks laughed today at the fact that western people use books to cook from. He said if it needs salt he adds. He basicly puts in what he knows is good and rest assured he knows whats good. I can't believe I brought some backpacking food just in case I needed something more.

I took a ride with Geshe Tulga and Sonam as well as a friend from Vermont and her son. We went in search of the place the makes rugs, incense and Tibetan crafts not realizing that it is Sunday and they were closed. We shopped around in the area called First Camp because it was the the first camp for the Tibetans when the settled here. Geshe Tulga is a teacher at the primary school so I spent about 500 rupees on supplies for his class. It sounds like a lot but at 50rups to the dollar, well you do the math. For that I was able to purchase a notebook for each of his 70 students.

Oh and great news from Dharamsala. Geshe Tsulga had an audience with HH the Dalai Lama. His Holiness told him that his health was not going to be a problem. His appointment with His Holiness's doctor confirmed this. He was told that there was a small problem but a week in Dharamsala taking Tibetan medicine would take care of it. Everyone here is overjoyed with the news. I guess there is a chance I may get to seem him before I leave.

I have captured some really nice footage for the docs I plan to put together when I get home. Its hard not to in this place. But I have to tell you it really is a place of two extremes, pastoral beauty and trash in the streets. The Tibetans who are thriving, you never see a Tibetan beggar and the Indians who seem to barely be getting by.

I met this little Swiss woman who has been sponsoring and coming here since 1996. She was at the school and wearing a churba (sp) which is traditional Tibetan dress. She loves this place and comes every year to spend time with her many friends here and check on the progress of the programs she sponsors. I was able to get a great picture of all 4'8" of her standing next to Geshe Tulga (the teacher) who is a few inches taller than me and has at least 30 pounds on me.

Bilbo

the old man

2008-11-22T10:50:00.003-05:00

An old Tibetan man came to visit Ge Peche today. He appeared frail at first but when watching him you could detect an inner strength gained only through a life of adversity. A small man with a smile that outshone the sun he made his way to Ge Peche's room. He was not in there long, maybe 15 minutes or so. When he came out his smile was even brighter than when he went in. He had a lightness to his step that he did not have when he arrived. He was overjoyed and happily showed me the small piece of candy that Geshe La had given him. Outwardly such a simple gift, inwardly a gift of love an compassion, stronger and more meaningful than any physical gift that could have been given.

Bilbo

rain

2008-11-22T10:38:00.006-05:00

A soft rain blew in today on a gentle breeze. It's freshness washing away the smell of burning fields and rubbish, replacing it with the scent of spring and things born anew. It lasted but only a short time but brought with it a renewal of life and spirit.

It came quietly as I walked the roof of house #2 contemplating the Heart Sutra which contains the essence of all Buddhism. The rain fell softly from grey clouds drifting slowly by, the fronds of the coconut palms danced in the courtyard on the easy breeze. In the distance the sound of monks debating in the hall. A reminder, all form, all empty, all interconnected, as one yet separate and individual at the same time... Form is emptiness emptiness is form...

Bilbo

The rest of the day

2008-11-21T23:53:00.004-05:00

I took a quick trip into Kushilnagar with Geshe Pema Tsering and Jampa one of the monks who has been looking after the gaggle of injees that have been hanging about. The difference between the Tibetan communities is pretty vast. On my last trip Kushilnagar was not much more than a small town at a cross roads. It is now very grown up, very dirty and very loud. On of the guys had to stop in a health clinic to have his toe bandaged. You walk into what appears to be this dumpy shop and find the most modern of equipment. It all looks so out of place. The people are very friendly and want to hear about you why you are here etc. The shop keepers love to talk business. What kind of business do you have. What is the competition like and even how much money you make. Westerners are often taken aback by some of the questions, but it is all very normal here.

My ride into town was a motor rickshaw. I've had this driver several times. He is very nice. He bought his motor or autorickshaw for $2000. He makes enough to support his wife and to children. He has a great smile and really seems to be happy.

I became a bit outraged yesterday. I came across a beggar at the entrance to Sera. His fingers and toes were gone. He is a terrible reminder of the true suffering in the world. It is outrageous that there is still suffering like this. With people running around with bank accounts larger that many small nations there is no excuse for it. A little generosity goes a very long way. One of the Boston folks gave him 20rupees. My guess is that will feed him for at least week. 20 rupees is about 50cents.

So after my outrage of the afternoon I go in the evening and have dinner with another Rinpoche. He teaches at a Dharma center in San Fransisco. It was a generous meal with many mo-mo's. (They are kind of like a chinese dumpling) There were several dishes and I don't know what any of them are called besides delicious or in Tibetan shimbo-re. All the while I kept thinking of the man begging.

My first trip here in 1993 was an eye opening experience. It lead me to start the sponsorship program for Geshe la students. Which Venerable Tsun Ma (Sue Macy)in Boston took over and has done so much more with it than I had ever done. She deserves so much praise and thanks for all she has done for Geshe La's students. This trip has served as a reminder for all that needs to be done. S0, hold onto you wallets when you see me coming! Just kidding, maybe. I do hope that the videos that come out of this will raise enough to do some good. My video about Geshe la's life in Boston raised nearly $900 which every penny of it went to the new addition to house 2a to make room for more monks.

I think I am supposed to be somewhere right now, but I can't for the life of me remember where.

kang nangi ma re
it doesn't matter

Bilbo

by the by drop this into google earth and it will take you to the house I am staying in.12°25'1.22"N 75°57'1.84"E

oops

2008-11-21T09:28:00.005-05:00

The Geku is the disciplinarion. He is a tall regal man who walks around the different ceremonies keeping everyone line. You do not cross the Geku. When he approaches you bow a bit in respect. My first meeting with the Geku was at Ngwangs debate. He asked me who my teacher was. I told him and he allowed me to continue to film. Well it was not as easy today. I was wondering around the debate courtyard filming away and no one seemed to mind. There were other westerners taking pictures When the debate time was over all the monks went to the central part of the debate hall and began some prayers. I of course continued to film. The Geku spotted me, came directly over and let it be known that I was done filming there for the day.

Bilbo

PS. Yes my bags arrived.

OK so I'll add a little more here since everyone enjoyed my being busted.

I'm really not sure why the Geku decided that my shooting this was fine one day and not the next. It may be that he was generous the first time. I stay pretty well back from things but even so there was is a lot of chatter and looks from the monks. Since its the Gekus job to keep them focused it probably best that he ran me off. I do plan to visit him and make an offering.

Slowing down

2008-11-20T10:07:00.009-05:00

Things have slowed down just a bit now that the marathon Geshe ceremony is done. Geshe Tsulga left for Dharamsala this morning to see the doctors. He assured me again before he left that he is fine at that I shouldn't worry about him. If we are supposed to put our faith in our teacher how could I believe anything else. I found out today that several divination's had been done by some high Lama's and they all said that there has been some mistake that he is fine. The other thing is the doctor he is going to see is highly respected in the west as well as by the Tibetans.

My brain is about to explode in a massive jumble of Tibetan words and phrases. It seems to be a favorite pass time/mission for the House #2 monks to teach me Tibetan. I now know enough to discern some pretty heavy accents from one monk to another which leads to even more fun. Or perhaps confusion. It's actually a lot of both; fun for them confusion for me. As I have explained to folks before, my Tibetan name is Lobsang Shenpen which means, has a good heart but is not to bright! (At least that is how I interpert it!)

I spent this morning shooting some video at the school. Let me tell you kiddies our American children do not know what hard work and discipline is. I'm sure this is no surprise to you. They have 10 grades and school starts at 7am. For some who are working on memorization it is even earlier. They take a short break mid morning then it is back to it. Another break for lunch and back to it, a break in mid afternoon and you guessed it back to work. They stop around 4:30 for dinner and then back to school at 6 where they will study until 9. They then go home and do homework! Discipline is strict and consequences can be severe. You will not see a teacher punish in anger, however, it is controlled and administered with compassion. Sadly many in the west do not get that this is possible. You don't find disrespectful spoiled kids here. They know what a precious opportunity they have been given. We really need to rethink education and discipline in the classroom.

I sat for a long time atop Jamyang Tashi's house just watching the world go by. There was a nice breeze blowing so the smoke that has kept the view obscured was blown off. The sky was a crystal blue with giant puffy cumulus clouds, their dark grey bottoms sharply contrasting the pure white cotton tops, drifting slowly by; the distant mountains rose peacefully from the plain. Small groups of Indian farmers worked the nearby fields clearing away the remnants of this years crops, cows wondered about munching on whatever they pleased. In the distance Choden Rinpoche continues his oral transmission. A young monk brought me some chai, (I'm talking the real stuff, yum!). It couldn't have been more peaceful. It was nice to get away from the hub-bub of house #2 where the Boston folks were loud and planning their next moves. I can't blame them. They are excited and want to take it all in. I'm just on a different game plan and all the over coordination reminds me too much of the west. I stayed up there for quite some time simply being at peace with it all.

How to capture that peace and bring it home? How to capture the rhythm of a simple life and incorporate it into our daily life to reduce the grind? I haven't missed House or Scrubs or the nightly news. As a matter of fact I haven't even thought about TV until just now. Well that is not entirely true. When I was on top of house number 2 last night I noticed that the neighbors hovel, that I think I described earlier, has a dish on top of it. It is the most bizarre thing to see this representation of our "modern" world on top of a house built on a design hundreds if not a thousand years old.

Anyway it is sleepy time in India.
Goodnight
Bilbo

PS. There is no privacy here at Cyber Cool internet cafe. I often look over my shoulder to find a young monk or two watching me type. I look at them. They look back at me and smile as if to say "Are you just going to type! What about some cool websites" OM AH HUM!

Geshe Ngawang

2008-11-19T09:17:00.009-05:00

Today was the last day of Geshe Ngawang's ceremonies. It culminated in a huge celebration at Tehor Khamsen. Sera Monastery is divided into Khamsens which are temples. From what I can gather they are determined by what region in Tibet the monk is from. (I have to make a side comment. These cyber cafe's, this one is call Cyber Cool, play the worst pop music you can imagine. Think of 1970's sappy pop sung in Hindi! and they are full of young twenty something monks) Ok, back to Ngawang. His Khamsen has about 1400 monks. The inner walls are painted with elaborate Thankas (painting) of Buddhas, and deities of all types. They are incredibly colorful and detailed. The huge columns are all adorned with silk embroidered decorations. I'm not sure how else to describe them. There is not a space on the walls, columns, pillars that does not have some elaborate design on it. It truly is a feast of color. On the Alter is an throne for HH the Dalai Lama. On its base is paintings of snow lions, which are very important to the Tibetans and it is decorated with gold and beautiful silks. Behind the throne are some very large statues the center one being Buddha Shakyamuni. A room off to the right houses the protector Deity. He has a very fierce aspect, someone you certainly would want to have on your side.

So this was Ngawangs final gig. 1500 monks sitting side by side in long rows. The Omse's (chanting master) deep resonant voice booming through the space and all the 1500 monks joining in. There is no other sound like it. The rise and fall of tone, the rhythm... it is other worldly. At one point a Geshe who is the manager of the monastery reads a long letter which contains the names of all the sponsors who made this event possible. Upstairs sits the folks from Boston and Vermont who helped sponsor this event. They are considered very important guest and given royal treatment. They are served tea and sweets by Geshes and other monks including the Khamsen manager.

As a part of the ceremony Geshe Ngawang leads the sponsors through the temple to make offerings at the alter. The chanting goes on as the parade of injees make their offerings. They then get to distribute money to each monk in the temple. I'm pretty sure they each received 20 rupees. This is a far cry from the 2rupees each they got from Andrea and I 13 years ago.

Now is when the fun begins. Since early this morning outside of the temple in huge pots, I'm talking the size of a hot tub, a group of monks have been preparing sweet rice. This is a special treat here and they only get it on special occasions. There are about 50 monks at the ready with silver buckets full of the sweet rice and big spoons. They each have a white Kata wrapped around the mouth like a cowboys bandanna. At the appropriate moment the come running into the temple full out and start dishing out the rice. There mission is to give out as much rice as they can as fast as possible. It is wild. I was at the end of a row when they came running full speed, slipping and sliding to a stop and falling over one another. Like some poor cameraman in the endzone the came crashing into me. What fun!!

After everyone was served they came back again and would bang the side of the bucket with their spoons and try their best to give out more rice.

I had one of the young monks with me as my assistant. He would hold one camera or another for me as we moved around the temple. He had a great time, many of the monks would tease him about his role. He seemed to love the attention. Afterwards we went up into the sponsors area and were given some sweat rice as well. This was a huge treat for him. This is not an area a young monk gets to enter very often.

When we were through we went to Geshe Tsulga and talked about his experience with the cameras. I thanked him for helping me and told him that he did a very good job, but that it was important that he remember that as much as he enjoyed doing this, that his Dharma practice was the most important thing. I asked him to please study very hard so that one day he could be my teacher.

There is so much more to today. A visit to Khen Rinpoche with the Boston group, walking in the courtyard during debate practice, a final farewell to Jamyang Tashi.... the list goes on but I can barely keep my eyes open to type. Tomorrow things will slow down. Geshe Tsulga, Geshe Ngawang and Geshe Gompa Namgyal will be heading to Dharamsala. For the next week or so I'll have some time to reflect on this incredible place.

Goodnight All!
Bilbo

ps. feel free to comment below. I'd love to hear from you as long as it is not about my grammer or spelling. I know. It will be taken care of at some other time.................maybe.

Jamyang Tashi

2008-11-18T08:43:00.008-05:00

I was pulled away from Ngawang's reception to have lunch with Jamyang Tashi. I was a bit miffed bythis at first. I felt that he was really dominating my time. That dissolved very quickly
when I arrived at his house. He is so kind and sincere. He is a big man with a hard round face. He looks as though he could put the fear of Yama into his students if he had a mind to. The depth of his devotion to his students is shows so clearly with everything he does. He is very close to receiving his Lharampa Geshe which is the highest form of Geshe and takes about 25 years to earn.

He treated me to a feast of food from Ladak. One of the plates called scew had small peices of thick noodles. There was tookpa a form of noodle soup. vegetables and more than one man could possibly eat. He was constanly getting up and talking to his students. At one point he
came back in and handed me a letter and said "My english is not so good so I wrote this so you would be sure to understand. " The letter said that he ws very sorry but he would be leaving Sera tomorrow because he is sick and need to go to Dharamsala. That
he was supposed to leave on the 11th but since I was coming he put it off until the 19th. He took
my hand and with tears in his eyes he looked deeply into mine and
said. "For me in my life there is the kindness of His Holiness the Dalia Lama, my mother and father and there is you. Thank you for your kindness and all that you have done for me for all of these years" I didn't know what to say. His sincerity. His Tears and by this time my tears it was all so overwelming. I asked to please remain in this life to spread the Dharma. That the world needed him and his kindness. This is a Tibetan prayer for a teacher.

He then produced some Gift's for me. A text of His Holiness teachings, a couple of
videos an pendant each for Andrea, Timmy and I. He then produced a small Tsa
Tsa of a protector Deity and said that it was given to him by the Dalai Lama and that the Deity would protect me as long as I prayed and believed in him. He also gave me a red scarf with a special knot tied by the Dalai Lama. These are all extremely precious gifts and by this time we both had tears in our eyes.

I did not want to leave him at that moment but I had to go back to video Ngawang. He walked me to the gate and told me that his students would be there to help i
me in anyway I needed while at Sera all I had to do was ask.

I walked back to house number 2 full of emotion. I could not speak to anyone I just needed some time to absorb what he had told. His Holiness, his parents and me for kindness. I certainly don't feel worthy of such a huge honor, but knowing the plight of his students I'll do what I can.

Big Love to All!!

Bilbo

Another full day

2008-11-18T08:28:00.009-05:00

This day has been so full I'll do it in 2 parts.

It started out with Ngawang coming to my door early this morning and asking if I was ready to go and see the Abbott. Of course wasn't so I had to scramble to get my camera gear together. Seeing the Abbot is a very big deal and for Ngawang it was to receive his

blessing as a new geshe. The Abbot live in a room on top of the main temple. It is a

very sparse room. Little furniture except for the low bed on which he sits when greeting people. I went in first to set up the camera. Rinpoche gave me a very kind and patient smile as I set up. He then had me summon Ngawang and one of the other new Geshe's that were waiting. Ngawang came in prostrated and made several offerings. Rinpoche complimented him on

his answers during the debate saying that they were very difficult questions and that he answered them very well.

As we were leaving Ngawang explained about me and the next thing you know I'm making a katag offering and receiving a blessing. The Abbot thanked me for my kindness through the years in helping support the monastery. It's a bit embarrassing because I don't feel that I have done that much.

Ngawang spent the rest of the day receiving visitors who all brought a katag and a donation. By the end of the day there must have been 500 katags. If I remember I'll come back and

add to this to explain the process. This cafe is full of monks since this is their holiday.

Ok. I'm back. Did you miss me>
I met a boy today who was about 12 years old. He had just arrrived here a few days ago. He lived in Lhasa. His parents went out and protested during the olympics. This boy came home from school one day and his parents were gone. The Chinese had taken them and put them in jail. There is no telling if or when they will be released so he escaped out of Tibet to Nepal and was eventually sent here.

This place is full of stories like his. One old monk at house #2 spent 12 years in a chinese prison. He has agreed to be interviewed so prepare yourself for a very difficult story to hear.

Big Love

Bilbo

Vajrapani

2008-11-17T08:43:00.002-05:00

I am sitting in an internet cafe with Lobsang Yeshe. On my visits so long ago he was a small boy and was great fun. He tried very hard to teach me english. It's like I never left and he is continuing to do so. I'll add more later since he has no idea of what I'm writing and watching someone type is not the most fun no matter the language.

Reall quick though I had a tour of the area today with a Geshe and another Lama and what changes from 13 years ago. I give you all the details later.
Tashi Delek!
Bilbo

The 16th part 1

2008-11-16T09:32:00.009-05:00

This has been a pretty amazing day. I think I'm using the word amazing a lot but it does seem to fit. So here it goes. There has been little power today so I have to break this down into 2 parts since this internet cafe is getting ready to close.

The biggest event of the day was Ngawangs Geshe ceremony. It began with about 2500 monks in the outdoor debate hall. This is a large open area with a roof. At the back end there are huge painting of the Buddha, lama Tsankappa and his disciples as well as many others. On a high and very ornate throne sat the Abbot of the monastery. In fron of him sat Ngawang Trinley and 3 others who were getting their degree. As a part of the ceremony Ngawang had to recite many verses of text that he had memorized while all the monks in the hall checked him for mistakes. Talk about a pressure cooker! Once complete he had to debate other Geshe's. This was a formality since he had already completed all of his exams. Even with that you don't want to blow it in front of so many. He did great and now has his yellow hat.

I thought I would take a break in my room for a little while. So much for thinking. Lobsang Yeshe felt that my time would be better spent learning Tibetan. Now you have to realize that I have pictures of Lobsang Yeshe as a boy of about 8 years old trying to teach me Tibetan. So we picked up where we left off. We spent about an hour and half at it until my brain was full. He said we could stop for today but would have to get back at it tomorrow. We had a lot of fun laughing at my mistakes.

I'll come back to the big puja (offering ceremony) that was held in the main temple later. I really want to share this next with you and I'm not sure how I feel about the whole thing. Keep in mind that Geshe La has been diagnosed with cancer and it sounds like there will be no western medicine. Not that this is a bad thing. When he tells you that he will be fine that could have a lot of different meanings on a lot of different levels.

Geshe La and the Boston group and I went to visit Ven. Choden Rinpoche and make an offering. Rinpoche has the look of one who has a foot in two worlds. Or maybe it would be better to say that he sees the world as it truly exists and lives in that world. This truly sets him apart from those of us who stumble along with our deluded minds, rapted up in our egos and things.

It struck me as we left that I have been very fortunate to have met so many of these great teachers who were trained in Tibet. As we wound our way through the dark streets I could feel tears builging as the realization came home that there are very few of these great lamas left, that Geshe Tsulga's generation is the last. To hammer this point even more we made our way to the stupa of Geshe La's root guru and teacher Khensur Rinpoche. I was fortunate enough to meet Rinpoche in 1993. (It really bugs me how people misuse the word guru. A guru is a spritual guide not a compute whiz!) Anyway, Khen Rinpoche passed away a few years ago and his room is now a sacred place where there is a stupa which holds his remains. We said some prayer with Geshe La and made offerings and then Geseh La told us of how Rinpoche passed. It is said that when he died he reamined in meditation for 7 seven days and that when his body was creamated his eyes, tongue and heart shapes remained. This were eventually placed with the stupa. There were also what is called holy relics within the ashes...

All this made me think of Geshe La. He gave us so much detail on what to do when a Lama passes. It makes me wonder if he was preparing us for his passing.

Choden Rinpoche

2008-11-14T23:07:00.003-05:00

Luggage update. No luggage, no update, so lets move on.

Tehor Khamsen, is next to where I am staying. It is the temple for the monks from the Kham region. There are many temples around the monastery as well as the massive central temple. Anyway, I woke the morning to the deep rumbling voice of the Ohmsey (sp?) chanting master booming out preliminary prayers before Ven. Choden Rinpoche continued his oral transmission of the entire works of Lama Tsankappa and his two desciples Kyejub Je and Gyelsub Je. This is a massive undertaking that will take several years to complete. For those of you who are not familiar, Rinpoche means "Precious One" and the title is given to Tulku's or those that have been recognised as as reincarnate Lama's. Buddhism is an oral tradition so receiving the oral transmission of these teaching is a very big deal. It is what keeps the teaching pure. Who is Lama Tsankappa? Once upon a time in Tibet the teachings were scattered and not very organised and then comes lama Tsankappa. He took all the teachings and made sense of them all in one neat little package. Ok this is oversimplified, but you will be hard pressed to find a more important figure in Tibetan Buddhism than Lama Tsankappa.

Laying in my bed in the dark, and hearing the prayers chanted with so many voices as one is transforming. It reaches and resonates to a place very deep within. How can something so foriegn as this feel so comfortable and familiar? Geshe la has said many times to me in the past "Maybe in a past life you and me were monks together". I can't tell you if this is so. I like to think it is.

The monks of house 2A are very busy this morning. Sweeping, fresh coats of paint for the designs on the walkways, clouds auspicous symbols and the like. Everything gets washed. Geshe Tsulga is arriving today and Geshe Pema Tsering will be here tomorrow. It is time for a celebration.

House #2A us a U shaped 3 story building. Kinda of like a little motel. The walk ways look down on a central courtyard with a massive coconut palm. The 3rd floor is entirely devoted to special occasions. There is a small gompa (temple) that has been decortate with colorful crepe paper and freshly hung thankas (paintings of Dieties). I was given the grand tour of the preparations and is was fun to watch the monks depating on which Thanka should be hung where.

The Indians and Tibetans have developed a symbiotic relationship. The Indians have prospered by the Tibetans being here. They have jobs around the monastery, building running around in autorickshaws and the like. Whats and autorickshaw you say?! It is a smelly little three wheeled vehicle that is used as a taxi. They remind of some of the rides I use to go on as a kid at the Point Pleasant boardwalk. They have a handle bar and throttle like a motorcycle and an annoying little horn that they sound consantly. I fit in these things about as well as I would fit in one of the kiddy rides now. When you see them tearing in and out of traffic, the driver hunched of the handle bars, willing his way through traffic you wonder if they don't all have a death wish. Then you watch for while and begin to realize that with all the craziness of it's appearances there is a rythm to the apparent madness and that somehow they make it work.

Geshe La should be here soon so I'm going to go for now. It also looks like it may rain so I'd better go and get my raincoat. Oh, that right. It's in my bag.

Je yung (see you)

Greetings from India

2008-11-14T03:39:00.003-05:00

Greetings All from the sunny south of India. Well arrived safely with all parts intact after a fun filled trip full of late flights, missed flights and cancellations. Of course my bags are not here. With any luck they will be here on tomorrows flight. If not I'll just have to borrow some robes. But Ill not bore you with the details of my trip.

I was met at the Bangalore airport by Jamyang Tashi and Thupten Derje, both of whom Andi and I have sponsored for many years. The ride to Sera Je took about six hours through some smelly city full of noise animals and people and some amazing country side. This area is called the deccan plain and was once seafloor (it seems as though everhwere was once seafloor). As you would expect by the name it is pretty flat, but it is surrounded by mountains that if you have ever seen south Indian architecture where it looks like mounds and of giant rounded off pillars extruding and building from one another you can some idea of what these mountains look like.

The Tibetan settlement and the monastery have grown tremendously. Sera Je is just one of many in the the area. When Andrea and I were here in 95 it barely had 2500 monks. There are now nearly 5,000. Geshe Tsulga's house was pretty empty since everyone was at lunch or at class. I spent some time with Jamyang Tashi's student all of whom are from Ladak. Ladak is one of the most remote places in India sitting on the far northern border with Tibet. It is inaccessible in winter. They greeted me with beautiful Kata's ( a silk white scarf often with Dharma symbols) and with a shyness that is almost unsettling. It is not unusual for some to hide behind one another and for some of them eye contact is not even a possibility. Fortunately I was able to get them to smile with my mispronouncing of Tibetan and other social gaffs.

With the monks that knew me from previous visits it felt like a homecoming. Ngawang Trinley said that this was my second home. The small boys (I'm talking boys as young as 7 or eight years old) in robes walking the streets from one class to another laughing and playing as they go, the chanting of prayers booming from the temple, the older boys sitting under trees or walking the streets reciting the books they are memorizing all feel so comfortable and make the feeling of homecoming more poignant.

Well I haven't had much sleep so that's all for now.

Bilbo

What's this trip about?

2008-11-09T14:19:00.007-05:00

If I wasn't snatching people from the jaws of death with the fire service, I was making animations or videos, living in the woods counseling kids, digging ditches and a host of other odd jobs. All held to pass the time and pay the bills . When not at work it was boy scouts, lacrosse or some other child raising activity. Then there are all the family things - a Saturday get-together here, a day trip there, another child's birthday party. The chores around the house, paint this, rake that. The list goes on and on and on. Now I am not complaining! I love my family and it is wonderful that we are so close and I don't regret a moments time spent with them. I have been very fortunate in my work, each has had it's own challenges and rewards. But in my preoccupation with the day to day I've left something on the sidelines. I'm sure that most of this sounds familiar to you.

This something has actually never been far. It's is a part of me that often visits me in my dreams, reminding me that I am a spiritual being. That nothing is truly as it seems and to see the world as it truly is we need only need to stop look and listen.

I have always been on spiritual quest. I remember as a kid going into a book store and hanging out in the occult section. It was usually pretty small and filled with books about haunting and Edgar Cayce. Not always very enlightening but I wanted to know. Through the years I explored everything from Wicca to Jesus. One of my biggest realizations was that all spiritual paths have merit. Ok, well maybe not all, the path of "I hate everybody because they don't look, think, feel or believe as I do and are destined for some hell from which there is no escape path" may not have much going for it.

So. What's this trip about? It's about stopping the world. It's about listening to my breath. It's about listening to the inner voice that is so seldom heard through the noise of daily life. It's about refuge and trust in something greater than self but ultimately is self. I'll be writing from a Buddhist heart but seeing through the eyes of a spiritual pilgrim. A teacher once told me "if you don't connect with what I am telling you today all I ask is that you don't throw the teaching away. Put it on a shelf. You may want to examine it from time to time to see how it fits." My shelf is pretty cluttered and long overdue for some examination.

I am not sure where this blog is going to take us. By committing to this I am committing to opening my heart, my soul, my trust to you dear reader. A friend use to lament how each day we got up and put on our mask to face the world (I hope he sees this blog). Only showing the world a little piece of us, hiding our true selves behind this mask of conformity. All the while burying our true selves ever deeper. What we find to be true on the first day of this journey may not be as true on the last. We'll just have to take off the mask and see.

Oh, by the way. Hanging out with 4,000 monks will be a lot of fun so stay tuned. There is no laughter on the planet like the laughter of a Tibetan monk. Multiply that by 4,000!

Big Love to All!

Bilbo

p.s. i won't always have time for spell check or grammar. that should make this all the more fun!

Departure

2008-11-05T19:20:00.004-05:00

The 12th is coming quickly and I am as ready for India as I am going to be. The original plans of shooting 2 new docs is still in place, however, there has been some changes. Geshe Tsulga has been diagnosed with cancer. I don't have any more info that I can share at the moment. I know he has consulted with doctors in Boston and plans to meet with doctors while in India as well as his teacher.

At the moment I don't have the words to adequately describe how I feel. Geshe La has been my teacher for many years now. For being such an awful student I am very fortunate to have such an amazing teacher. Karma is a funny thing.

If you have Google Earth installed here is the latitude and longitude of Geshe La's house at Sera Je. Drop them into the fly to box and it will take you there.

12°25'1.22"N 75°57'1.84"E